03 February 2009

Pregnancy Changes

Pregnancy is truly a miraculous thing - not only because of the wonder of new life growing inside you, but also because of the miraculous growth one goes through physicall and emotionally. 

All the sudden, I am finding the motivation to do all sorts of projects which I have nicely managed to put of for so long. The universe seems to be playing along, too. In the same week, we are getting our not-so-urgent heating problems fixed and some needed paint work done. 

My bump is growing. I pee twenty times a day. I have to eat every three hours. I cannot sleep on my back and have to lie on my side with a pillow between my legs. Bending over is not as easy or pleasant as it once was. It is a phase of constant change, or rather improvement, inside and out.

I think what scared me the most about pregnancy and motherhood was the inevitable change in my life. I seriously resented being told how much my life would change after having children. I always heard it as some kind of finger-shaking comment intended to make me reevalute my selfish, immature perspectives. And you do when you are responsible for another human being's life, but I still did not like it. When reflecting on this, I realized I wasn't reacting to the comment. I was reacting to the idea of change.

I haven't always welcomed change, mostly because I have always equated change with the negative. Change, though, is the nature of life and is itself neither bad nor good.  This transformation is one of the most exciting I have ever been through (and I have had my fair share of drastic life changes simply due to the expat life). This process has so far taught me one very important thing about life: Embracing change is in fact easier than fighting or fearing it.